How I Do It...

"Oh my... ALL of these are yours?" asked the strange woman at the park.  "Well... I don't know how you do it!  I only have one and I can barely keep up!"  This is an all to common reaction to our family of four young children.  I'm not sure that it is the number of children or the disbelief of the closeness of their ages that gets people, but I always give a half-smile and say "I guess we are just crazy!" which is what everyone wants you to admit anyway.
My admittance of crazy allows some to breath a sigh of relief and others can relax their unconsciously tense muscles.  The truth is, though, that I don't think we are crazy at all... they are.  So many parents in our society have taken to the comparison game in order to feel as if they are competent parents.  With the addition of social media sites, it has skyrocketed to a whole new level.
Mothers today believe if they don't feed their children GMO-free, 100% organic, home cooked meals in the shapes of farm animals at every meal, they must be a failure.  If they don't have a Pinterest-inspired birthday party with matching take home arts and crafts, their child will go on to live a life of crime.  If every single activity is not finished off with a "participation" trophy their children will become outcasts of society, opting to wear a trench coat in place of their sports uniform.
SO... you want to know how I do it?  I just do it!  I don't lose my mind on Pinterest or schedule every moment of my children's lives.  I cook healthy meals, but I'm not afraid to pull out the chicken nuggets and frozen pizza when necessary.  I am confident in the knowledge that I know what is best for my children, and do not listen to the crazed opinions of others.  I pray aloud and read bible stories to them, but I also let the occasional curse word slip... and apologize for it. 
I let them know that there are things I don't know (instead of racing for my phone), and there are times for them to play alone.  I tell them I am sorry if I raise my voice and am honest beyond compare.  They know that the shots will hurt and death is really sad.  They know that nothing makes me happier than to see them getting along, and nothing makes me more angry than being dishonest.
How do I do it?  I am just me, and I encourage them to be just them.  I want them to see that no one is perfect, and it takes a village.  I am only human, so I make mistakes, I cry, I am late, I laugh, I fall, and I do the best I can every single day.
How do I do it?  I pray to God every single day, in good times and terrible times, to thank him for this amazing family He has given me.  I give it all up to Him and know that He is in control.  He has trusted me with these amazing tiny people, and I am so grateful.  I better no mess this up!

Still miss you...

Sometimes I lie awake at night imagining my dad swimming in the pool with my kids or pushing them on the swings at the park.  I wish he could know how much Peach's appetite mimics his own or just how much LJ really resembles him.  I hate that my children will not be able to listen to his childhood memories told in only a way that he could tell or taste his homemade peach ice cream.
It has been a little over 2 years since my father passed away, and I still miss him desperately.  I would love to call him and ask how to repair the drywall in the garage or how he thinks we should remodel the bathroom.  He always enjoyed doing things around the house, and I think he secretly enjoyed when I asked his advice on how to do something in my own home.  I miss his dry humor and his unbelievable humility.  I miss his little smirks and the way he could fall asleep at the drop of a hat.  I miss the unconditional love he had for our family.
I hate that he will not know my children, and they will not really know him.  He will never know how great Bubba is at soccer or how intelligent Baby is.  Yes... I will share stories, memories, and photographs but nothing can take the place of his presence.